Obsession
by Colleen17
Summary: Whilst filling in at another station, Johnny finds one of the lineman a bit strange. When he turns up as a replacement at station 51 Johnny's life becomes a living nightmare.
1. Chapter 1

"Hello." The sleepy Paramedic was woken up by his phone. It was the first day of a four day break. Johnny was leaving in the afternoon to go camping for a couple of days. He needed to get away from the city to unwind from a hectic couple of weeks.

"It's Chief Houts Johnny…I really need a favour." He didn't wait for Johnny to respond. "I need an experienced paramedic to step in at 127s for the next forty-eight hours. You would be partnered with a new paramedic. You're my last hope Johnny, I've tried several of the experienced paramedics but with Anderson getting married up state, a lot are not available."

"Yeah, Roy's going to that wedding. Ok Chief. I'll just need to shower; I should be there in a couple of hours." Johnny felt very disappointed. He really needed a break, it would have to wait.

"Thanks Johnny...Badger is the Captain...just like old times hey Johnny." Chief Houts tried to make the OT more pleasant sounding to his friend.

"Badger….. Captain…long way from lineman, hey Chief?" Johnny thought back to his rescue days.

"The same could be said about you Johnny." The Chief said with pride for his once boot back in his engineer days.

Johnny dragged himself out of bed into the shower. It did the trick and woke him up. He grabbed some late breakfast, packed a couple of uniforms and headed out. He called into station 51 to grab his turnout gear and boots.

It was a long drive, not in distance, but in traffic to 127s station. This was one of the older stations, in an older part of town. He pulled up and parked in the only available spot in the parking lot. Johnny was looking forward to seeing Captain Badger; he hadn't seen him for over a year.

He made his way into the station and quickly found the Captain's office. Johnny tapped on the door and heard the gravelly voice of his old friend call out 'Come in'. Johnny opened the door and had a big smile on his face as he entered.

"Johnny...well, look at you...so you're my experienced paramedic replacement." He stood to shake Johnny's outstretched hand.

"Cap….it's good to see you." Johnny said with affection. His first station had taken him under their wing and looked after him when he was a wet behind the ears boot. It was the now Chief Houts who had encouraged Johnny to go into rescue, after he had finished his probation period.

They talked for a while and then Badger stood to take Johnny around the station to introduce him to everyone. When Johnny met the paramedic, he knew why Chief Houts had asked him to be the replacement. He was only a year or two younger than Johnny, but as far as maturity was concerned he seemed very young.

"What happened to your partner?" Johnny asked Tim Woodruff.

"He got caught in a ceiling collapse while rescuing the owner of a home that was on fire last shift." Tim was very nervous; to him John Gage was a legend. The team of Roy DeSoto and John Gage was known for their innovative skills and for bringing the paramedic program to the established public accepted program it was today. It was well known that the program lacked acceptance in the beginning but it was paramedics like Gage and DeSoto who through perseverance made it a successful program.

"How long have you been partners?" Johnny asked with a calm friendly voice. He was trying to put the young paramedic at ease.

"Two months. Jason is really good…..he's helped me settle in really well." Tim was beginning to relax. Johnny's friendly persona was putting him at ease.

"Who was your training team?"

"Stone and Jackson." Replied Tim.

"I trained with Stoney; we're both out of the first class at Rampart….Good man….that's good." Johnny closed up the drug box and told Tim he should do the calibrations. He explained that the young man should take charge of certain duties since it was his station.

After finishing their morning duties Tim introduced Johnny to the rest of the crew. It was a mixture of old and new. One of the linemen, Bobby Cipps, made Johnny feel uneasy when he shook his hand. He seemed to really give Johnny the once over with his eyes and the handshake wasn't a firm grip but more feminine. The paramedic shook off the uneasy feeling and helped Tim with his chores.

It was in the afternoon that Johnny felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise. He turned around and found Bobby leaning against the wall watching him. He tried to smile but felt very uneasy with the way the lineman was looking at him.

"Married John?" Bobby asked casually. He continued to stare at the paramedic.

"No." said Johnny. He kept his back to the questioning man. Johnny felt very uncomfortable with this line of questioning.

"Got a girlfriend?" Bobby was a bit pushy with his questions Johnny thought.

"Not at the moment...between girlfriends...you know what I mean?" Johnny shrugged his shoulders and wondered if Bobby did know what he meant.

"Yeah...You're a good looking guy, must have a lot of girls out there wanting to go out with you." Bobby pressed on; ignoring the uncomfortable atmosphere he was creating. Johnny's back allowed him to look over the paramedic intensely.

Johnny was feeling very uneasy and was wishing for the klaxons to sound but of course they didn't. "Um...a few." Johnny said vaguely. He was beginning to think this guy must have a sister that he kept an eye out for a potential boyfriend.

Tim came into the room and scowled at Bobby, "Johnny, the guys are going to have a game of basketball, want to join in?"

Johnny pushed himself off the counter he was leaning on. "You bet….I'm up for a game." He just wanted to get out of the room and conversation with Bobby.

They went outside and started playing. It was very hot and soon the guys were shedding their shirts. Bobby didn't play, just watched. Johnny took his shirt off and heard a gasp. He looked around thinking someone had hurt themselves but couldn't tell where it came from. He shrugged and continued taking off his shirt.

Bobby licked his lips and took in the sight of a bare chested Johnny Gage. He tingled all over. No one had ever made him feel this way. His breaths quickened and his heart pounded.

The men continued playing oblivious to Bobby's façade. They stopped for drinks. One of the crew brought out a pitcher of ice tea. The ice tea spilt and trickled down Johnny's chin onto his chest as he drunk it greedily. Bobby approached Johnny; he was close to the edge as his eyes followed the paths of the ice tea down the paramedic's chest. "You're well built for a paramedic." He stated trying very hard to keep his voice calm. Inside he was far from calm.

"I'm also a fireman and besides rescue keeps me fit." Johnny, feeling uneasy under Bobby's gaze, replied. _'What is it with this guy?_' he thought.

"Johnny, we're ready." Tim called and waved his hand in the direction of the basketball hoop. The paramedic noticed Tim give Bobby a dirty look as he jogged towards the group of men.

Soon the game was back in full swing. The paramedics only had two calls in the afternoon. It was definitely a much quieter station. He was relieved it was not too busy, but at the same time, wished they were away from the station more. It seemed everywhere he turned Bobby was watching him, with a creepy smile plastered on his face. It was more like a smile a young nurse would give him if she wanted him to ask her out. He shivered when he thought about it, _'Nahhh… I'm getting paranoid,_' he thought.

The klaxons sounded just after dinner and they were called out to a structure fire. There were no victims so Tim and Johnny helped fight the fire. As per usual the paramedics were teamed up with the linemen. Johnny was teamed up with Bobby. Tim half smiled as if in sympathy.

He took the lead. Bobby placed his hand on the paramedic's shoulder to support him, but, then that hand slid down his back to his hip. Johnny adjusted his stance to move his hip away from Bobby so that the hand had to move back up to his shoulder. He felt the hand rub over his shoulder and then move up and down his back. He was glad he was wearing his turnout coat. He was feeling very uneasy. Bobby tapped him on the shoulder to change over. He was relieved to change positions.

Johnny kept some distance between them and placed his hand firmly on Bobby's shoulder but didn't move it. The lineman stepped back into Johnny a couple of times and turned his head and almost touched the paramedic's face with his. He said, "Sorry didn't mean to step into you." Johnny wondered if he meant it. The whole situation made the paramedic feel tense.

Johnny was glad when the fire was out and helped with clean up but stayed close to the other crew. He didn't want to find himself alone with Bobby. It was hard sweaty work but Johnny enjoyed it. It took him back to his early fireman days. He loved being a paramedic but he loved being a fireman also. He was lifting a piece of wood to check underneath when he slipped on something greasy. Bobby grabbed him around the waist to stop him from falling. The lineman's hand made its way under the paramedic's turncoat, and with all his hard work his shirt was untucked. This gave Bobby the opportunity to slip his hand under the shirt. Touching Johnny's skin sent electrifying feelings through his body. He kept his hand there for as long as he could. Normally Johnny wouldn't have thought anything of it, but when he looked to say thanks to whoever caught him, he froze when he saw it was the lineman.

"Aahh…. thanks for the save." Johnny straightened up and moved away from Bobby. He felt a cold shiver run through him and wanted nothing more but to wash away the feeling of the lineman's touch.

Bobby put his other hand on Johnny's hip and said, "Steady there, you ok?"

Johnny stepped away further and half smiled. "Yeah I'm ok, thanks." He quickly moved away and stepped between Tim and Jack, another lineman, and continued the clean-up. Tim looked at Johnny and frowned; he noticed the older paramedic looked a bit upset. He looked in the direction Johnny came from and saw Bobby smiling as he continued with clean up. Tim shook his head and thought_ 'Bobby had a new obsession.'_


	2. Chapter 2

Tim sheepishly thanked Johnny for all his help and for filling in at such short notice. Bobby's behaviour had put a damper on the whole shift. What should have been an exciting experience for Tim became a game of cat and mouse as Tim tried to keep Johnny out of Bobby's sight.

Bobby couldn't concentrate; the sight of this exquisite creature that had come to work at their station had taken his breath away. Usually he only watched and discretely at that. He never touched, but he couldn't help himself; besides the paramedic would be gone by end of shift. That thought alone sent him into obsession overdrive.

Johnny couldn't get away from 127 quick enough. He couldn't get the knot that had a tight hold in the pit of his stomach to loosen._ 'What had happened to him?' _he asked himself. _'Had a man, a man, felt him up, on two occasions, no less,' _he thought. The whole shift ate away at him leaving him feeling so uneasy he jumped if anyone as much as brushed passed him.

Johnny remained locked away in his apartment for the remaining days off; the planned camping trip long forgotten. His phone was ringing but he ignored it. He didn't want to speak to anyone and was worried that Bobby had somehow got his phone number. He took several showers; trying to wash away his uneasiness.

The night before shift Johnny tried to pull himself together. This was silly he thought. He'd probably never see Bobby again and yes it could have been all innocent. Who could he tell anyway, no one would understand how he was feeling? He thought of calling Roy but felt too embarrassed to tell him and was a little afraid that Roy would think differently of him; that he had brought it on himself.

Johnny was a nervous wreck by the time he started shift. He had dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep. He was jumpy and found it hard to look at anyone. He couldn't understand why he felt this way and didn't know what to do about it. For the first time in his adult life he not only felt very alone but wished he wasn't a fireman/paramedic. He knew he had felt this uneasiness once before but couldn't remember when; unbeknown to him, it was those lost memories that were making the incident have such an impact on him.

When Roy arrived for shift, he found his partner already changed and checking the supplies of the squad. "Hi...I tried to call you a couple of times but there was no answer." Roy looked at his partner and frowned. Johnny stiffened. Roy could see the dark circles under Johnny's eyes.

"I went camping, didn't get back till late last night." Johnny continued to repack the drug box.

"From the looks of you, maybe you should have got home earlier. It's not good to start a forty-eighter tired. You should know better than that." Roy placed his hand on Johnny's shoulder. The younger paramedic instantly reacted.

Johnny jumped and backed away from Roy's touch. He saw the concerned look on Roy's face and immediately regretted his reaction. "Sorry, you startled me...I was concentrating on the box." He quickly put the drug box away and went into the kitchen and grabbed a cup of coffee.

Roy stood next to the squad and thought, _'What just happened?_' If he didn't know Johnny any better he would have thought he almost looked scared of him. Roy shook his head and made his way into the kitchen. He eyed his partner, Johnny was sitting at the end of the table sipping coffee and reading through the paper. He never looked up at Roy, in fact he never acknowledged anyone as they walked into the kitchen. He remained hidden behind the paper trying desperately to pull himself together.

At roll call Johnny volunteered latrine. Cap Stanley was a little taken back but allowed him the duty. It was a one man job and all Johnny wanted was to be left alone. Little did he know that was the worst thing for him; he didn't realise how much he needed his friends.

All the crew began to slowly notice a change in their young paramedic. He gave everyone a wide birth and jumped at the slightest touch. Marco was confused when Johnny yelled at him for backing into him when he was pulling some hose off the engine. Marco had simply not seen Johnny walking by.

Cap became very concerned when he noticed both at lunch and dinner Johnny waited for everyone to get their serves before he attempted to grab any of the dishes from the centre of the table. The paramedic was usually the first one tucking in but it seemed to the Cap that he was keeping his distance from everyone. Cap looked over at Roy and saw that Roy was frowning and sending glances at his partner every now and then.

After dinner Cap called Johnny into his office. "Take a seat John." He gestured toward a seat in front of his desk. The paramedic sat but didn't really look at his Cap. "How were your days off John?" He thought he'd start with small talk.

Johnny shrugged. "It was ok." Again, he didn't look at his Cap just scanned the room trying to look casual. Cap noticed the nervous twitching of his paramedic's hands.

"I see here you worked at 127s for the first two days." Johnny nodded as he fiddled with a button on his shirt, still not making eye contact with his Captain. Johnny was really worried something had been said and that somehow he was going to be in trouble for it. He could feel his hands beginning to get moist and he was having trouble breathing.

Cap didn't notice his young paramedic becoming agitated and continued on with his questioning. "Well, did everything go ok over there?" He asked.

The reaction was instant, Johnny's head shot up. "Why? Did someone say something happened?" Johnny didn't mean to sound so demanding but he was scared. The shift at 127could ruin his career and reputation, if Bobby Cipps made any accusations, even though he knew he had done nothing wrong. He didn't realise his anxiety and lack of sleep was making him think unreasonably. He was breathing so rapidly that he was on the verge of hyperventilating.

"No one said anything. I was just asking is all?" Cap regarded his anxious paramedic and wondered what the hell had happened at 127s to cause his paramedic to react like this to a simple question. "John, are you ok?"

Johnny realised he was causing his Cap concern and took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. "I'm ok, it's just they were a strange lot and I thought they weren't happy with me or something." He tried to ease his Cap's mind with his explanation.

Cap was not totally convinced, but he knew he wouldn't get any more out of Johnny so he let the conversation slide. He decided to have a talk with Roy later and see if he had any thoughts on his partner's behaviour.

When Johnny left the Captain's office he went straight to the bathroom. He was shaking and felt sick to his stomach. He ran into the cubicle and lost his dinner. When he came out Chet was standing there and had an apprehensive look on his face.

"Dinner didn't sit well." Johnny awkwardly said and went to the sink to rinse his mouth and wash his face. He felt totally drained as all the emotions he had been feeling caught up with him.

Chet walked up next to Johnny, the paramedic immediately stepped away from him. "What's wrong John? You're acting like a scared rabbit or something." Chet was truly concerned for his friend.

Johnny felt his eyes begin to burn and his hands start to shake. He splashed water on his face again and took a deep calming breath.

"Nothing's wrong Chet. I'm just a little tired is all?" Johnny tried to smile to wipe away the concern of his friend.

"Listen babe, I know you. Something's happened to you and you're not handling it too well. Tell me and maybe I can help." Chet pleaded with his friend.

Johnny looked at Chet and shook his head "You can't help me Chet. No-one can."

Chet was taken aback by the stricken look on Johnny's face. He knew that something really bad had happened and that his friend was in trouble. He asked _'How could he help his friend?'_ He had heard Johnny had worked at 127s maybe that was a good place to start. He went to the dorm to make a few phone calls.

Chet didn't know anyone at 127s but maybe one of his friend's at a nearby station had heard something. He needed to talk to Roy and tell him what happened with Marco and in the bathroom. He was not going to let this go.


	3. Chapter 3

Chet spoke to Roy about Johnny. Roy shook his head; he had no idea what was going on with his partner. Chet had drawn blanks with asking around. Roy spoke to Marco the next morning to find out exactly what happened.

"It's strange Roy...when I bumped into him Johnny jumped away like he was ...terrified...he threw up his hands and said stay away from me. I told him I was sorry, that I didn't see him but it was as if he thought I was mad at him. That it was his fault...it was all very strange..." Marco shrugged, not knowing how else to describe it.

Roy rubbed his hand over his face." I just don't know what's got into him." Roy paced in front of the linemen.

"I think it has something to do with 127s...I asked around but no one has heard anything" Chet too shrugged his shoulders.

"Wait 127s...what about 127s" asked Roy.

"Didn't he tell you ...he worked there the first two days we had off" Chet told Roy.

"No he didn't tell me, he said he went camping" Roy looked confused wondering what his partner was hiding.

The klaxons sounded and they were called out to an MVA. Roy got into the squad, Johnny was already in there. They headed out, Roy glanced at his partner a couple of times. Johnny had his paramedic mask on and was more than ready, he thought, to work. When they arrived there were many cars involved so there was more than one squad. The paramedics worked individually, working their way along the many cars.

Roy tried to keep an eye on his partner but had to forgo that when he was busy trying to extricate a woman from her car who he suspected had spinal injuries. When he got to the triage area he was confronted by a paramedic from 36.

"What's wrong with Gage? I asked him if he needed help he yelled at me to leave him alone. All I did was touch his arm; he nearly jumped out of his skin."

"I don't know...he's been a bit jumpy lately...look he'll probably apologise later. Don't worry about it...you know Johnny" Roy tried to reason with the paramedic.

"Yeah I know Johnny...I guess we all have a bad day" He smiled and got on with looking after the victims.

Roy frowned, he needed to sit down and have a talk with Johnny. Whatever it was was starting to interfere with his job. Chet came over and grabbed a backboard and neck collar from the squad. Roy called out to him, "Are you working with Johnny Chet?"

"Yeah he's got a couple of bad ones" Chet ran back to Johnny.

Johnny was shaking, the driver was holding onto his arm. Johnny was willing Chet to hurry up. He didn't like being left alone with this guy. The passenger had already passed away. Chet passed Johnny the collar.

"Now don't leave me Chet" Johnny told him.

Chet looked at Johnny a little worried "I won't Johnny, its ok I'll help you"

"That's not what I mean. Watch everything I do and watch the driver ok...OK" Johnny was looking at Chet and waiting for an answer.

"Ok Johnny I'm watching" Chet said reassuringly.

Johnny nodded and got on with helping the driver. Chet was wondering what he was supposed to be seeing that he hadn't already seen many times over.

When the squad got back to the station, the paramedics sat down to a late lunch. The rest of the crew deliberately stayed out of the kitchen to give Roy a chance to talk to Johnny.

"Johnny what's wrong...you seem a little jumpy and don't deny it everyone has noticed." Roy held a stern look to try to make Johnny realise he needed to explain.

"Nothing's wrong Roy...I'm just a little tired, that's all." Johnny continued to eat. He felt his face go red, he just had to get through the afternoon and night, and then he would be back in his apartment, safe.

Roy sighed "How come you didn't tell me you worked at 127s over the break? You told me you went camping" Roy said accusingly.

"I did right after shift at 127" Johnny felt his body stiffen. Just saying 127 was making his skin crawl.

Roy threw up his hands and went to the sink and washed the dishes. Johnny hung back and waited for Roy to leave and did the same. He kept everyone at a distance, no touching, therefore no accusations.

When shift finally ended Marco said his goodbyes; he was going on two weeks leave. Roy asked Johnny over for breakfast but he declined. Johnny just wanted to get back to his apartment and lock the door.

Both Roy and Chet tried to call Johnny but received no answer. Again Johnny didn't want to answer the phone and find Bobby on the other end. He did manage to leave the apartment to drop off his uniforms and do some grocery shopping. After doing those tasks he found he wasn't as jumpy as he was a couple of days ago.

When Johnny got home he took a deep breath and told himself to stop acting foolish. Nothing had been said about his shift at 127 so what was he worried about. 'The fact that a man touched him' he thought 'but you'll never see him again. Forget about it' he told himself and that's what he tried to do.

You're becoming obsessed he thought. Johnny gave Roy a call and tried to act casual over the phone. He asked Roy if he needed any help with any projects.

"Always Junior" Roy answered, feeling relieved to hear the old Johnny offer. "Stay for dinner" he added.

"Ok I'll be right over" Johnny hung up the phone and made his way over to Roys. He worked alongside Roy and tried to concentrate on the task. If Roy touched him at all he tried not to react. He soon found himself relaxing and feeling a little better about himself. Time will heal he thought as he drove home. He slept well that night.

When Johnny arrived for shift, he was feeling calm and well rested. He changed into his uniform and made his way into the kitchen for coffee.

"Hey Chet...Mike..." Johnny greeted them with a smile.

"Johnny"

"John"

Chet looked at Johnny and was pleased to see his friend looking happier. Roy walked in "Pour me one too please Junior" asked Roy.

"Sure pally" Johnny replied.

"Roll call in five" Cap called out.

Johnny grabbed his hat and felt someone brush past him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, its ok he thought to himself. When he turned around standing next to Cap was Bobby. Johnny felt the colour in his face drain away and his hands started to tremble. The knot was back in the pit of his stomach.

"Everyone, this is Bobby Cipps. He's Marco's replacement for this shift and a couple of other shifts' stated Cap.

Everyone broke away from roll call. Johnny had been assigned dorms. He left to do his task while the other crew members shook Bobby's hand and introduced themselves.

"Where you from?" asked Chet.

"127s...its south from here, older part of town" said Bobby happily. Chet looked around for Johnny, who was nowhere to be seen; he needed to talk to him. This all seemed so coincidental that someone should turn up from the station Johnny last filled in for.

"Aah Johnny...I think you got the wrong idea when you worked at 127." Bobby was trying to sound sincere but deep down he was taking in the sight of this beautiful creature standing in front him.

"What idea would that be Bobby?" asked Johnny suspiciously. He was nervous being alone with this man.

"Well, when I was backing you up at the fire, I think you may have got the wrong impression. You see I was massaging your back while you were holding the hose. I do it for our paramedics all the time. They're not used to hauling hose so their back muscles get tired pretty quickly. I should have explained. I'm sorry if it unsettled you. Tim told me you were a little upset after the fire and well...when I thought about it ...I thought you may have got the wrong idea." Bobby shrugged his shoulders and held out his hand to shake.

Johnny shook hands and decided to give Bobby the benefit of the doubt. "I have to help Roy, see ya" Johnny left. Ok he thought, I'll accept his explanation but I still want to stay away from this guy. I have my friends, I'll be ok, and he wouldn't be able to do anything around them. 'Get a grip Gage' he thought. He's just another fireman, but deep in his stomach that knot was tightening.

Bobby smiled to himself. He looked at his hand; touching Johnny had sent electric impulses through his body. He knew he would have to be careful, this was Johnny's domain and if he stepped out of line these men would notice, especially his partner.

He watched from the back of the engine, Johnny was kneeling down doing the calibrations. He could just make out the lines of his back muscles. This was a busier station so hopefully he would get to watch Johnny move on his rescues more often.

The klaxons sounded and the station was called out to a man down. They arrived to a two story home. The owner had slipped on his roof whilst repairing it and couldn't move without slipping further. Roy and Johnny made their way up to the roof and quickly tied the man off to a safety line. Johnny moved with ease over the roof, he collected the gear being sent up to help move the man. Bobby watched him in awe; he was like a cat the way he moved. Roy and Johnny lifted the man into the stokes and Roy followed the stokes down while Johnny stood on the roof slowly releasing the rope. Roy gave Johnny the thumbs up and Johnny climbed back down.

The man had a broken arm and bruised shoulder. Roy went in the ambulance with him while Johnny tidied up and put the gear away.

"Here let me help you Johnny" Bobby picked up the splint box and put it in the squad. "You have a great sense of balance. I've never seen someone move with such ease on a rooftop as you."

"Everyone reckons I was a cat in another life" joked Johnny, he was finding himself relax around Bobby.

"Cat or not you're definitely a good rescue man" Bobby's hand brushed over Johnny's. Johnny quickly pulled his hand away but Bobby was already walking back to the engine.

In the cab of the squad Johnny was berating himself. 'Quit it John, it was nothing.' He kept wiping his hand over his pants, trying to wipe the feeling of the touch away.

Bobby was right about one thing, he would have to be careful, the men, watched out for their young paramedic. Chet had seen Johnny talk to Bobby as he helped at the squad and he had noticed Bobby hanging around watching Johnny's every move at the station. Chet found it unnerving; he could only imagine how Johnny found it.

Johnny arrived at Rampart just a few minutes before Roy came out of the treatment room. He rushed to the men's room and washed his hands vigorously. He sighed, he felt stupid for feeling this way. Bobby seemed genuinely a nice guy, just a little strange in his ways. Nothing was going to happen to him, he was surrounded by his friends. 'Be a man' he told himself. He just couldn't help but feel a little unnerved. He washed his hand again. Roy poked his head into the men's room.

"There you are. I wondered where you got to" Roy said watching his partner closely.

Johnny looked up and smiled and continued to wash the back of his hand.

"I think its clean Junior" Roy said.

"Huh, what?" Johnny hadn't realised he had been washing his hand over and over. "I was lost in thought" Johnny shrugged his shoulders. He wiped his hands and followed Roy to the nurse's desk.

Roy offered Johnny coffee and poured himself some as well. Dixie came and sat down. She enjoyed talking to Roy and Johnny; they helped make her day more pleasant.

"Dix we need some supplies" said Roy as he handed her a list.

Johnny continued to sip his coffee, he watched as people interacted with each other in the hallway. Without thinking he was continually rubbing his hand on his pants.

"Something wrong with your hand Johnny?" asked Dixie innocently.

"Huh" Johnny looked at Dixie and stopped rubbing his hand, he hadn't realised he was doing it "Aah, no Dix. It was still a bit wet from washing it earlier."

"What's this about a sore hand?" asked Dr Early. He went to grab Johnny's hand; Johnny pulled it away and backed away. He had a startled look on his face, Dr Early frowned "Johnny, I was just teasing" he smiled but was somewhat concerned with Johnny's reaction.

Johnny smiled and looked at his three friends, he felt stupid for reacting the way he did but somehow couldn't stop himself. "Sorry Doc" Johnny lifted his hand and showed the front and back of his hand, "see nothing's wrong with it". He continued to sip his coffee.

Dr Early noticed that Johnny kept his distance from him. He watched him leave with Roy. Dixie moved next to Dr Early, she could see concern etched in his face.

"What's wrong Joe?" She asked.

"I don't know...Johnny's reaction to me. If I didn't know better I'd say he didn't trust me" he said sadly. He looked down at his hands "I've seen that look before".

"Where?" asked Dixie.

"At the clinic I volunteer at from time to time, downtown." He shook his head "I just hope I'm wrong" and he made his way back down the hall.

Dixie sat down and pondered on what Dr Early had just said.

Roy and Johnny made their way back to the station. Roy was thinking about some projects he needed to get on with at home. Johnny was wondering what he could do at the station that would keep him in the company of his friends.

"Roy I think I'll catch us up on the log book when we get back." Johnny thought at least Cap would be in the office and he would be out of sight. Yes he would feel safe with the Cap working away at his paperwork. He rubbed his hand over his pants, trying to rub away the feeling of Bobby's hand. This didn't go by unnoticed by Roy.


	4. Chapter 4

Bobby's obsession with Johnny grew as the day went on. He watched Johnny eat, over his mug of coffee, and fantasised about Johnny's mouth. He deliberately sat opposite Johnny so he could have a good view of him. He tried to stretch his legs and maybe feel Johnny's but Johnny had tucked his legs under his chair. He watched Johnny's hands, such long slender fingers he thought. Everything about Johnny made his body tingle, just looking was becoming an obsolete option; he needed more, no one had made him feel this way before.

Johnny, after lunch, noticed Chet was in the locker room going through his locker. "You going to be here a while Chet" asked Johnny.

"Yeah, I'm finally cleaning out my locker" answered Chet.

"Good" said Johnny as he sat on the bench opposite his own locker. He pulled out his boots and polishing gear. Chet looked over at Johnny and wondered if Johnny was worried Chet was going to set a trap for his pigeon.

Bobby walked into the locker room "Hey guys" he said casually and sat down on the bench opposite Johnny.

Johnny's body immediately stiffened, he quickly finished applying the polish to his boots and got up to go to the bathroom.

"Want me to finish those for you Johnny?" asked Bobby.

"Aahh, no thanks...I've got it...I like to let the polish sit on the boots before I rub" explained Johnny. "I'm just gonna wash my hands". Johnny jogged into the bathroom.

"They're just gonna get dirty again Gage" yelled Chet, he shook his head, but then he looked at Bobby. 'Is Bobby checking out John' he thought. 'Nah', Chet went back to cleaning his locker. He stopped cleaning and thought about what he had seen earlier; Bobby watching Johnny at different times in the station. He looked over to Bobby but he was gone. Chet sat down on the bench. What was he thinking, but it all fits? Johnny's behaviour after working at 127s, and now, thought Chet.

Johnny came back to the locker room and sighed in relief, Bobby was gone. He continued to polish his boots in silence. Chet looked over at Johnny now and again; he wanted desperately to ask him about Bobby but didn't know how, without embarrassing his friend. He decided to talk to Roy about it and then maybe Roy could talk to Johnny. He quickly finished up and jogged into the kitchen looking for Roy.

Johnny quickened his pace to finish his boots. He didn't want to be alone. He felt someone standing behind him. Johnny jumped up; his balance was unsteady when Bobby reached for him. Johnny threw his boot and brush at Bobby and tried to turn to run but Bobby had him by the neck. He applied enough pressure to make Johnny black out.

Bobby dragged the unconscious paramedic into the dorm and laid Johnny on his bed. He knew he'd have to be quick.

Johnny was unaware of the hands that moved over his entire body. When he finished he straightened up Johnny's clothes and left the dorm. He put away Johnny's boots and polishing gear and casually strolled outside. He lent against the back wall and thought about his hands travelling over Johnny's body. He could feel his own body almost tremble with desire. He smelt his hands; Johnny's scent was still on them. Bobby's obsession had gone to a whole new level and he had no intention of turning back now.

The klaxons sounded for a structure fire. Johnny woke up, completely disorientated. He heard Roy yell his name and he headed for the bay to find everyone scrambling into their seats. Johnny jumped into the squad and looked at Roy. Roy passed him the paper with the address. Johnny immediately looked it up on the map.

The squad followed the engine, so Johnny put away the map and filled out his log form. He then sat back and tried to remember what had just happened. Everything was fuzzy but he had this uneasy feeling that something bad had happened. He hated feeling this way and wished it all away. He decided to concentrate on the run, he'd think about it later.

Station 51 was the third engine to arrive. They were assigned to the back of the warehouse. Roy and Johnny was the first squad there, so they geared up for a sweep, to make sure everyone was out. When Johnny put on his turnout coat he noticed that his belt to his trousers was loose. He moved the buckle to the correct hole and then continued to do up his coat. That knot in his stomach tightened a little more. Roy looked at Johnny, and nodded towards the warehouse. Johnny nodded back.

They did their sweep. It was hard going, the heat was intense and the smoke made visibility near impossible. Johnny heard someone calling and tapped Roy on the shoulder. He cupped his hand around his ear to let Roy know he had heard someone. Roy listened and he also heard someone calling. They both headed in the direction of the noise and found two men lying on the floor coughing.

Roy and Johnny removed their masks and gave the men a few clean breaths. They put their masks back on and helped both men out of the warehouse. Both workers were quickly put on oxygen and while Johnny got their vitals, Roy contacted Rampart.

"You boys need any help?" asked Bobby as he sipped a bottle of water.

Roy looked up and shook his head "Shouldn't you be helping Chet?" asked Roy.

"Had a problem with the hose, so I grabbed some water while we changed over" said Bobby casually. He looked over at Johnny and watched him work for a few seconds and made his way back to the engine. He wanted to see if Johnny was aware of his doings. It appeared not, so he smiled as he walked back.

Johnny didn't give Bobby a second thought, he was too busy putting in IVs and checking vitals. Johnny accompanied the workers in the ambulance; one was having a little more trouble breathing, so Johnny was kept busy for the short trip.

Dr Early asked Johnny a few questions about the worker who was clearly struggling with his breathing. Once he was satisfied he let Johnny leave. Johnny headed straight to the men's room and immediately started washing his hands. He suddenly felt dirty; he washed his face and neck.

Roy had seen Johnny rush into the men's room and waited for him at the nurse's desk. He figured Johnny must have been in the bathroom at the station when the klaxons sounded and needed to finish.

Johnny walked over to Roy and accepted a cup of coffee. Dixie looked up and watched Johnny sip his coffee. Johnny turned his head when the treatment room door opened. Dixie noticed a bruise on Johnny's neck. She motioned to Dr Early, and pointed at Johnny's neck.

"What did you do to your neck Johnny?" he asked the paramedic.

"What do you mean?" Johnny raised his hand to his neck and winced when he pressed on the bruise.

Roy looked over also, Johnny was feeling very crowded and was not liking the attention. "Roy...Johnny...treatment room 3 please." Dr Early waved his hand in the direction of the treatment room. Roy pushed Johnny towards it.

Johnny sat stoically on the bed and endured the examination as best he could. He tried desperately not to flinch when Dr Early touched him. He was breaking out in a sweat and his hands trembled. He wanted to wash them and his neck but knew that would look very strange to both Roy and Dr Early.

"I think the worker had a really tight hold around my neck" explained Johnny. He couldn't think of any other reason he was bruised, but then he remembered the locker room. His face went pale and he swallowed hard trying to keep his stomach intact but he lost the battle.

His knowing partner recognised the signs and quickly grabbed a basin and put it under his chin. Johnny almost passed out. He was laid back on the bed. "Feel better?" asked Roy.

Johnny really didn't hear him; he was back in the locker room. He remembered feeling anxious and then Bobby's face swam in front of him. He threw his hands up; his breathing was becoming too rapid. He heard his partners calming voice telling him to slow down his breathing.

Johnny sat up and looked around; "I need to go to the men's room" he said hastily and jumped off the bed.

"Go with him Roy" Dr Early ordered.

Roy followed his partner. Dr Early made some phone calls. When the paramedics got back to the treatment room another doctor was waiting with Dr Early.

Johnny sat back down on the bed. "What did Johnny do in the bathroom Roy?" asked Dr Early.

"He washed his hands and face and neck...and ...then his hands again" Roy felt like a heel, that he was betraying his friend somehow.

Dr Early nodded knowingly and looked at the other doctor. He was watching Johnny closely. Johnny had his head bowed and was rubbing his hands over his pants. Johnny was unaware of the scrutiny; all he wanted to do was shower. He felt so unclean. He looked at his belt and remembered how loose it was.

"Oh God" he whispered, he squeezed his eyes shut. 'What had happened? How did he get to the dorm?' Then he heard someone ask him a question.

He looked up "You all right?" asked Roy. He was very concerned with Johnny's behaviour.

"I'm alright Roy...I just thought of something...that's all" he smiled and tried to relax his muscles. He looked around the room and suddenly became aware of the other doctor.

The HT beeped asking for their status. Roy looked at Johnny and then Dr Early. Dr Early would have liked to keep Johnny at the hospital but he had no physical reason to, so he just nodded.

"Squad 51 available at Rampart".

They were called out to a run. Both Roy and Johnny said goodbye to Dr Early and headed out.

Dr Early turned and looked at the other doctor, "Well?"

"I would have to agree with you Joe, but I think he is unaware of it happening to him, although I think something came to mind as he sat on that bed. If it's happening at his workplace, someone has to step in and remove him" said the doctor who was in his early thirties.

"That won't be easy. Have you ever dealt with the County Fire Department?" asked Dr Early.

"No...but something has to be done and soon" the doctor said with concern.


	5. Chapter 5

The run Johnny and Roy went on didn't require a trip to the hospital, so they made their way back to the station. Johnny was sitting rigid in the passenger seat rubbing his hand over his thigh. His other hand held onto his belt. Johnny was running the locker room scene over in his mind. He remembered Bobby being there and the feeling of wanting to get away and then nothing. He frowned as he looked out of the window, he needed a shower desperately.

The squad backed into the bay. Bobby opened Johnny's door and stepped aside to let Johnny out. Johnny gave Bobby a wide birth.

"Roy I didn't get a chance to tell you that Johnny fainted in the locker room." stated Bobby.

"No I didn't..." Johnny's voice trailed off is that what happened he thought.

"Yeah you did Johnny. You got up too quick and just keeled over. I grabbed you and carried you to the dorm" Bobby looked very concerned and tried to put his hand on Johnny's shoulder but Johnny stepped back. He was rubbing his hands continually on his leg and was becoming agitated.

"Did he hit his head?" asked Roy, as he watched his partner retreat away from Bobby.

"No I caught him before he hit the floor. I was on my way to get you when the klaxon went off. Next thing I know Johnny was running to the squad so I thought he was ok" explained Bobby. "Guess they woke you up" Bobby said to Johnny.

"Yeah they did. Did you by any chance grab me around the neck?" asked Johnny as his hand went up to his neck.

Bobby noticed the bruise "I could have I can't rightly remember. Did I do that?" Bobby asked as he reached for Johnny's neck. Johnny was unable to pull away before Bobby touched his neck. The feel of Johnny's skin made Bobby's obsession nearly push him over the edge, but Roy was here and he would stop him. He needed to wait for another opportunity.

Johnny felt his blood run cold; he couldn't stand this man being anywhere near him. He rubbed his neck vigorously to erase the feel of Bobby's fingers.

"The worker from the warehouse fire could have caused it" claimed Roy not noticing the interaction between the two men. "Johnny I want to check your blood pressure" Roy motioned for Johnny to sit on the back of the squad. He got the gear out and knelt next to Johnny.

Jealousy radiated from Bobby's body as he watched Roy handle his partner. He wished his hands were holding Johnny's arm. Johnny was busy watching Roy, so Bobby was free to stare at Johnny. His eyes ran over Johnny's body, he could feel his hands on Johnny's body. He licked his lips; he had tasted Johnny's mouth and desperately wanted more.

"What was it?" Johnny asked Roy.

"Bit high for you 100/80, you're usually 100/70" Roy patted Johnny on the shoulder "I think you'll live Junior".

"Gee thanks pally" Johnny smirked at Roy. He looked up and caught Bobby looking at him before Bobby could look away.

"I need to take a shower Roy" stated Johnny. He stood up abruptly. That knot was back and it was strangling his stomach.

"Ok make it quick Johnny...in case we get called out" Roy called after his retreating partner.

"I feel like a fifth wheel around here" claimed Bobby.

"Wanna help with dinner preps?" asked Roy.

"Sure I just need to go to the bathroom and I'll be right with you" Bobby walked away as Roy made his way into the kitchen.

Roy walked into the kitchen, Chet was playing chess with Mike and Cap was sitting at the table doing some paperwork. Roy went to the refrigerator and pulled out the food needed for dinner. He put the lasagne into the oven and started mixing ingredients together to make garlic bread. Chet got up and stood beside Roy.

"Roy we need to talk"

Johnny was scrubbing away the tension and unsettling feelings from his body. He let the hot water sooth his tense muscles. He was living in a nightmare he thought. He felt so uncomfortable and couldn't understand how it had got this bad. Just tonight and Bobby would be gone he thought. Oh God, how was he going to sleep knowing that man was close by, but his partner will be next to him and Chet will be just across from him, surely he'd be safe. What am I saying, you're paranoid Gage, get a grip. He rewashed his neck and hands.

Bobby stood to the side and watched Johnny in the mirror opposite the shower. He could just make out the outline of Johnny's body, he so wanted to be in the shower rubbing his hands over his beautiful body. He needed more of this man, could he claim he fainted again. I could knock him out and make it look like he hit his head on the way down; I'll have to be quick. He's obsession with Johnny was overtaking his common sense.

Johnny got out of the shower, he felt a little better. He quickly dried himself and started to get dressed into a fresh uniform. When he put on his belt he remembered how he had found it loose. Suddenly there was a crack to the side of his head. Johnny fell into Bobby's waiting arms. Bobby made quick work of Johnny's clothes. He ran his hands over Johnny's body. Bobby's body felt like electricity was running through it. The sensations running through his body drowned out the running footsteps across the bay area.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY PARTNER" Roy yelled at the top of his voice. He grabbed Bobby and dragged him off Johnny. Chet balled his hand into a fist and was about to punch Bobby but his arm was grabbed by Mike.

"Let the police take care of him Chet. Scum like that is not worth spitting on" Mike held Chet back while Cap grabbed Bobby, and dragged him into the bathroom tying his hands to a pipe under one of the sinks.

"Mike call it in, Chet grab the equipment. How is he Roy?" asked Cap, he was shaking so badly that even his voice sounded shaky. They were all shaking with rage and shock.

"He's out cold Cap. Oh God Cap, he had his hands all over Johnny" Roy looked with disgust towards the bathroom where Bobby was tied up.

"Roy I know how you feel but you need to concentrate on Johnny" Cap tried to calm his senior paramedic.

Roy suddenly grabbed his Captain's arm "All those other times where he said Johnny fainted...working at 127" Roy looked down at Johnny and squeezed his eyes shut "Oh Johnny what you must have been going through" Roy's hands were shaking so badly he had to take several deep breaths to calm himself. He couldn't imagine how his partner, his best friend, had been feeling the last few days. "We need to get him to Rampart Cap" Roy pleaded with his Cap.

"Roy calm down, the ambulance is on its way, we all need to stay calm for Johnny's sake" stated Cap to everyone.

"Here Roy" Chet put the drug box next to Roy and then opened the biophone. Sirens could be heard in the distance. "Rampart this is squad 51, how do you read?"

"Squad 51" the calm voice of Dr Early came over the line.

Roy motioned Chet to hand him the phone. "Dr Early it's Johnny"

"What happened to Johnny Roy?"

"He was attacked here at the station Dr Early. I don't think it's the first time Doc."

"Alright Roy, you need to get him to Rampart as soon as possible. Is there an ambulance on scene Roy?"

"It's arriving now Dr Early. Johnny's been hit on the side of the head, he's unconscious"

"Get him in the ambulance and talk to me as soon as you're on your way. Do you understand Roy? You have to get him out of there before he wakes up" Dr Early's calm and authoritative voice forced Roy to keep focused.

Chet guided the ambulance attendants into the locker room. "Don't touch him" he yelled at them.

Roy, Chet and Cap gently lifted Johnny onto the gurney. Mike like a sentinel, stood watch over Bobby; with his feet standing apart and his arms folded across his chest and the look of 'Don't mess with me' on his face.

"I'll call Chief Houts and then we'll meet you at the hospital" explained Cap.

"I want to go with Roy" pushed Chet.

"You need to stay and give a statement to the police Chet" Cap ordered him.


	6. Chapter 6

Roy looked down at his partner and took a deep breath. "Johnny, can you hear me? Johnny." A small moan came from his partner but nothing else.

Roy got onto the biophone. "Rampart this is squad 51." Roy's voice was still shaky but his emotions were a little more in control.

"Squad 51 I read you. What are Johnny's vitals Roy?" Dr Early had been standing by the work station waiting for Roy to continue communication.

Roy gave Dr Early Johnny's vitals. "Check the pupils Roy. Is he giving any signs of waking up?" asked Dr Early.

"His pupils are equal and reactive. He's making some sounds and his eyes are just beginning to move. He's waking up Doc." Roy dropped the phone and lent over his partner. "Johnny can you hear me?"

Johnny's head hurt and he felt dizzy. He slowly opened his eyes but couldn't focus on anything. His partner suddenly came into view; he was frowning and sounded very concerned.

"Roy?"

"Good boy, how does your head feel?"

"Hurts Roy...What happened?" asked Johnny.

Roy didn't want to tell Johnny anything. He was afraid it would distress his young partner. He tried to think of what to say. "Dr Early he's just woken up and wants to know what happened." Roy told the doctor, seeking his advice, before he answered Johnny.

"Just tell him he hit his head, that's all Roy. Nothing else."

"10-4 Doc." Roy turned to Johnny; who's eyes were glazed with confusion.

"You hit your head Johnny. Just relax." Roy patted Johnny's shoulder. He could feel the ambulance backing up. Doors suddenly flew open and Dr Early jumped into the back of the ambulance.

"Johnny." He waited for Johnny to focus on him. "We're at Rampart and we're going to take you into a treatment room to check your head. Is that ok with you?" He watched for Johnny's reaction.

"Yeah Doc...my head hurts." Johnny swallowed hard. "W...wwhy am I naked?" He had suddenly realised he had nothing on. He felt himself start to shake.

Roy jumped in. "You were having a shower Johnny. Don't worry we covered you straight away partner."

Johnny relaxed a little but was clearly distressed. "We're going to take you into the treatment room now Johnny. It will just be Roy and I in there, ok?" Dr Early tried to reassure the young paramedic.

"Ok." Whispered Johnny. He knew by the way Dr Early was talking to him and the concerned look on Roy's face that something bad had happened. He couldn't control his body, it shook violently and his eyes began to burn.

"Johnny, I'm going to give you a small dose of diazepam just to calm you a little. I'm not giving you enough to knock you out, just enough to help you calm down. Ok?" Dr Early waited for Johnny to acknowledge what he was saying. Johnny nodded as he tried to calm his breathing.

"You boys wait here, we'll handle the gurney." ordered Dr Early. The ambulance attendants looked at each confused. They couldn't understand why they weren't allowed to handle Johnny.

Dr Early and Roy pulled the gurney out of the back of the ambulance and made their way to the treatment room. A nurse went to follow them in but Dr Early stopped her. He took the chart from her hands. "We'll handle this. No one is to enter this room without knocking first. Put a sign up for me, please nurse." Dr Early left the bemused nurse standing in the hallway.

Captain Stanley was having trouble keeping his two men under control. Both Mike and Chet wanted to take Bobby out back and beat the living day lights out of him. Cap was glad to see the police car pull up.

Explaining what this man had done to his young paramedic was one of the hardest things he had ever had to do in his life. The policeman stood and silently wrote down everything Cap was able to tell him. He then got Chet to tell him what he had witnessed throughout the shift.

"Where is Gage now?" asked the officer.

"He's at Rampart with his partner. I haven't heard anything so I'm guessing he's still unconscious." said Cap.

The officer nodded and approached Bobby. "Can you untie him so I can search and handcuff him please?" asked the officer.

Mike undid the ropes and stepped away. The officer searched Bobby, read him his rights and handcuffed him. He led him to his car. As he was doing so, Chief Houts and Captain Badger walked into the station. Both men watched the officer put Bobby into the police car. Both had a look of disbelief on their faces. Chief Houts was feeling sick to his stomach; it was on his request that Johnny had been sent to 127 and subjected to this man.

"Chief." Cap shook Chief Houts hand.

"Hank this is Captain Badger from 127. He's known Johnny since he was a boot, like me." Chief Houts explained.

Cap shook hands with Badger. "I just can't believe this." He said with a slight quaver in his voice. "I've known Johnny since he was nineteen...Did he tell you if anything happened at my station?" He asked.

"No, but something happened, cause he definitely was not the same Johnny when he came on shift after working at your station." Cap told Badger.

"How so?" asked Chief Houts.

"He was like a scared rabbit, jumped if anyone touched him and wouldn't look anyone in the eye." Chet told the Chief and Captains.

"I tried to talk to him…..he was more worried that somehow he was in trouble...looking back now I guess he thought we wouldn't understand and maybe he thought we would blame him. That he brought it on himself." Cap shrugged his shoulders.

"That's exactly how he would have felt. I know that's how I would have felt." injected Mike.

Chief Houts sighed and looked down, he felt so guilty, but he had to do what was protocol. "There will be an investigation and Johnny will need to give his side of the story."

"Now wait a minute, this is Johnny Gage we're talking about, one of our own. You can't let this get out, think of Johnny. He wouldn't be able to face his peers if he thought they knew what happened." Cap was becoming angry with the Chief.

"There are rules and procedures we have to follow Hank." countered Chief Houts.

"I don't care about rules and procedures. If you let this become common knowledge you'll kill that young man's career. You have to keep this very quiet and let the police charge that animal...and lock him away."

"And throw away the key." added Chet.

"Look I'll do my best Hank but I can't promise anything." Chief Houts looked at Captain Badger. "We need to question your crew." Captain Badger nodded.

"We'll stand down the station. I'll call in C shift early. You are welcome to leave and make your way over to the hospital. I'm sure you're all anxious to find out how Johnny is," stated Chief Houts.

Everyone nodded and made their way to the locker room. Chet carefully put Johnny's things away and changed. They left soon after, while the Chief called C shift in.

"I told you I didn't like what I was seeing." Captain Badger said accusingly.

"I know...I guess I was hoping that nothing would come of it. Of all people, Johnny...I just can't believe it. I don't know how I will be able to look him in the eye." They both pursed their lips together, knowing that they had both let their young friend down.

"This investigation is gonna hurt Johnny, we have to do something." Captain Badger told Chief Houts.

"You know what the departments like, rules and regulations come before people."

"Well change it for crying out loud. This is Johnny we're talking about. Someone who saved our lives more than once. You have to protect him," begged Captain Badger.

Johnny was diagnosed with a minor concussion. Dr Early now had the hard part of the examination to do.

"Johnny, I have to check your body to make sure you haven't been hurt anywhere else." Dr Early waited patiently for Johnny to respond.

"Why? I don't hurt anywhere else," replied Johnny.

Dr Early looked at Roy and then grabbed a stool and sat at eye level to Johnny. "Johnny, I know someone has hurt you and has been making you feel very uncomfortable over the last few days."

Johnny started to breathe fast; he didn't want to have this conversation. He just wanted it all to go away. He was finding it difficult to focus on the doctor.

"Johnny as your doctor no one, not even Roy if you want him to leave, will know what's been happening to you. Johnny you can't run away from this, you'll have to face up to it. Bobby will be charged and the police will want a statement from you."

Johnny bit his bottom lip. He thought if Bobby gets charged then he'll be out of his life. He sighed and made his decision, "Ok Doc but I want Roy to stay. I don't think I can go through this alone. Somehow I feel like this is all my fault and I don't know why. What did I do to cause this to happen?"

"Nothing Johnny, nothing. Bobby is a sick man and needs to be locked away and helped. But, in order to do that I have to examine you." Dr Early said as kindly as he could; deep down he was grieving for this man, for his loss of innocence that life had dealt him.


	7. Chapter 7

It was proven after Dr Early's examination of Johnny that Bobby had only touched Johnny, nothing else. Roy, Cap, Chet and Mike were relieved when they were told. Bobby had only confessed to being attracted to Johnny and that he only tried to touch him. He maintained that Johnny had fainted and that he had fallen and hit his head and that he had only taken advantage of the opportunity to be alone with him and subsequently touch him.

Johnny was moved from the treatment room to a private room in an isolated part of the hospital. It was very peaceful and Johnny was able to sleep without being disturbed. Dr Early introduced Johnny to a colleague of his Dr Andrew Raymond.

"Andy is a psychologist and he specialises in abuse, which includes as in your case, molestation and workplace abuse."

"Hello Mr Gage" Dr Raymond held out his hand to shake Johnny's.

Johnny reluctantly shook his hand and immediately rubbed it over the sheets of his bed as if trying to wipe away his touch. This didn't go unnoticed by both doctors.

"I'll leave you to it "Dr Early left the room.

"Mr Gage".

"Johnny. Call me Johnny" interrupted Johnny.

"Johnny, I'm here to talk to you and hopefully help you." Dr Raymond sat down in a chair beside Johnny's bed.

"Look Doc I just want to forget about it and get on with my life" explained Johnny.

"Well forgetting is the hard thing isn't it" asked Dr Raymond?

Johnny squeezed his eyes together, he was so on edge he couldn't stop himself from confessing "I can feel his hands on me, all over me. I try to wash the feeling away but it doesn't work. What did I do wrong?" Johnny had unshed tears in his eyes, he hated feeling like this.

"You didn't do anything wrong Johnny, it was Bobby".

"Everyone keeps telling me that but it doesn't work. I still feel..."

"Dirty, violated..."

"Don't, please, don't say that" pleaded Johnny.

"But its normal Johnny to feel that way...and in time...those feelings will go away"

Dr Raymond stayed with Johnny and talked to him for over an hour. By the end of the session he thought he had made some progress with Johnny.

Dr Early was waiting for him outside the room "How did it go?"

"It went good. He's an incredible young man; I can truly say I've never met someone like him before. He has such a wonderful spirit. You know as troubled as he is I could still see that spirit for life in him" claimed Dr Raymond

"So do you think you can bring that wonderfully spirited man back to us" asked Dr Early?

"Yes. You know Joe he has an inner strength that will overcome this...but...we have to take it slow...not rush him" said Dr Raymond with caution in his voice.

"You're the expert Andy" Dr Early shook his hand and they left the floor together discussing what to do next.

After Badger spoke with his crew it was Tim who confessed to knowing about Bobby. He had in fact been a former lover and had seen Bobby's infatuation with Johnny. He had no idea that the infatuation became an obsession. Tim soon found himself transferred to a station of misfits within the department. Homosexuality was still a dirty word within the department and Tim paid the ultimate price for admitting it. He was also being punished for not coming forward about the behaviour of Bobby towards Johnny.

Both the police and Fire Department investigations were under way. The police were the first to interview Johnny. He had asked if both Roy and Dr Early could be present. The police agreed. Johnny described what happened at 127 and then Bobby's explanation for rubbing his back. He then went on and told them about waking up in the dorm and later discovering that his belt was loose. He spoke of how he would often catch Bobby watching him and would quite often brush past him in doorways.

The officer confessed that if it wasn't for his partner catching him running his hands over his body that Bobby would probably get away with it. He also said there was no proof that Bobby caused Johnny to pass out or that he had hit him on the head.

"So what's going to happen? He's not going to get away with it is he?" asked Roy.

"He won't get much since he didn't sexually abuse Mr Gage. However Mr Gage can sue the Fire Department for an unsafe workplace and can probably sue Mr Cipps for the stress he has placed on Mr Gage through his actions." Both Roy and Johnny mirrored their disgust with the law. "I'm sorry, the laws just aren't out there but maybe one day they will be and hopefully it will stop people like Mr Cipps from feeling free to molest other men."

They shook hands and he left. Johnny looked at Roy "I'm never gonna be free of this man. He's gonna walk free and he can move in to my apartment building and there won't be a damn thing I can do. What am I gonna do Roy?"

"Johnny calm down. If the law won't help us, there are other ways to deal with creeps like Cipps. Ok. You have a lot of friends. Forget about him and just get better and let us deal with him." Roy looked at Dr Early who quickly administered some diazepam into Johnny's IV. They both stayed with him till he was asleep.

"Doc he's right, he may never be free of this creep."

"Johnny's strong and if he can conquer this then this Bobby character won't be able to hurt him. He'll just be another spectator who means nothing to Johnny." Dr Early reassured Roy.

"This Dr Raymond is that good?" Dr Early nodded,

Roy hung back and sat with Johnny for a little while longer. They still had the Departments investigation he thought. "Cipps better lose his job over this" he said to himself.

Over the next couple of days Dr Raymond worked with Johnny and got him to open up and talk about his feelings. It was whilst he was talking about how touching his hands made him uneasy when a memory from his early teenage years suddenly flashed in his brain.

Dr Raymond had seen the change in Johnny's demeanour and asked him about what he was remembering. This was what he was waiting for, he had known for some time that this wasn't the first time this had happened to Johnny.

"I was about twelve or thirteen. Both my parents worked so one summer break my dad left me at my Grandmothers for a couple of weeks. His sister lived there also. My grandmother was an invalid. I remember sitting in a chair watching TV. My Aunty standing behind me watching the TV too, but while we were watching she rubbed her hands over my chest and squeezed my pecks and nipples. I remember thinking afterwards how sore my chest was. The next time we were going to watch TV she positioned the chair in the same place and I refused to sit in it. She didn't let me watch TV after that." Johnny looked at Dr Raymond "she was molesting me".

"Yes she was Johnny, but being so young and not knowing any better you probably just forgot about it...because...you didn't like it".

"Is that why Bobby had such an effect on me?" asked Johnny.

"Yes and now that you've realised this we can move on and heal Johnny. In fact I think you're just about ready to go home. How does the end of the week sound? Just a couple more sessions" announced Dr Raymond.

"Sounds good Doc" and for the first time Johnny gave the Doc his crooked smile.

Johnny told Roy all about the session. Roy could see that Johnny had taken a big step to recovering and hopefully would be back in the squad soon.

"Just out of interest, is your Aunty still alive?" asked Roy.

"No, she drowned in a swollen river" answered Johnny.

Roy nodded and thought about the upcoming hearing at the Fire Department. He couldn't help but worry about the outcome and the effect it will have on his partner.


	8. Chapter 8

Johnny made huge progress with Dr Raymond and was able to understand his feelings and felt much better about himself. He even got to the point of forgiving his aunty and laying those memories to rest. He was packing up and getting ready to leave when Dr Early came into his room with his discharge papers.

"All set Johnny?" asked the calm and smiling doctor.

"Yeah Doc...Doc there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about."

"Sure Johnny." Dr Early sat down on the bed next to Johnny.

"How did you know? About me and that I was being...you know…."Johnny still had trouble saying the word as an adult. "Abused."

Dr Early looked down at his hands and twirled his rings on his fingers; an action Johnny had seen him do on many occasions. "Well I don't know if you're aware, but I work at a free clinic from time to time downtown. Unfortunately, one of the cases we see a lot of down there is abuse. It's mainly children, but we also see young adults who have suffered through it as children and are still suffering through it as young adults. Not many are as in your case a male abusing another male, but it happens. The symptoms are always the same whether the abused person is a male or female; not liking being touched, lack of eye contact, aloofness, constant washing of hands some to the point that their skin is so raw its bleeding."

"How do you help them?" asked Johnny, genuinely concerned.

"I refer them to a counsellor...and...I just talk to them and listen. That's very important. Sometimes that's all they need; is for someone to just listen to them and not pass judgement over them."

"Do you think if someone like me...who's been through it would be able to help them by ...talking and listening to them?" asked Johnny.

"I think talking to someone who's been through it would be a big help...but Johnny…you have to be ok yourself before taking on other people's problems." Warned Dr Early.

"I know Doc and I'm getting there...maybe one day I'll be able to stand in the same room as Bobby Cipps and not feel the urge to shower." Johnny looked forlornly at Dr Early.

"You will Johnny; you're the strongest man I've ever met. I know you'll conquer this and be able to talk about it without feeling ashamed." Assured Dr Early.

"Thanks Doc, that means a lot coming from you." Johnny looked with admiration at his doctor knowing that he probably saved his life in a lot of ways. The door to his room opened and Roy walked in, he was smiling.

"Hey partner, Doc...ready to go home?" he asked happily.

"You bet!" Johnny and Dr Early stood and shook hands. Johnny felt a closeness to this doctor; he had become more than a friend over the past couple of weeks. The young paramedic admired and looked up to this man like a son did with his father. Roy also saw the bond between Johnny and Dr Early and he was so grateful for Dr Early's handling of his partner.

Roy took Johnny grocery shopping on the way home and called into the dry cleaners for his uniforms. Chet and Mike were waiting for them. They helped their young friend settle into his apartment not wanting to leave him alone for his first day home. They chatted about some of the shifts he had missed and talked about sport, all the usual stuff.

Dr Raymond had been talking with them and had told them that it was important to treat Johnny the same. He had said to not handle him cautiously but to show him, by being natural, that nothing had changed between them. Their friendship covered Johnny like a warm blanket. Chet ended up spending the night after watching one of his favourite old horror movies with his young friend.

Johnny woke him early and made him breakfast before Chet left to start shift.

Johnny spent the day quietly and caught up on cleaning since no one had been in the apartment for a couple of weeks. In the afternoon he met up with Dr Raymond. The doctor had arranged for Johnny and himself to go visit the station.

Johnny was anxious at first but that soon washed away when he saw his friends. Having been with them the day before had made the visit easier. Without even thinking about it he went to his locker and pulled out his uniforms that needed dry cleaning. Roy watched with pride as his young partner overcame the horrible incident that occurred at the station. He thought about Dr Early's words, that Johnny was strong, and agreed with admiration.

Before leaving Johnny, Dr Raymond and Roy sat in the Cap's office to discuss the upcoming hearing. Cap went through Johnny's statement to the police and he added a few things he had since remembered. Both Roy and Cap went through their statements. Johnny remembered a few more minor details and added them. They were all set; the hearing was set for Friday, three days away.

Four days prior at the police hearing, Bobby Cipps had, with the help of a good lawyer got off lightly with community service. He had agreed to see a therapist to control his urges and that seemed to have convinced the judge that he was genuinely sorry.

Johnny hadn't gone to the hearing but Roy and Cap did. They wanted to see what Cipps was pleading in his defence because they needed to be prepared. They both realised that the Fire Departments hearing was not going to be easy on their young friend.

"I'm going camping for two days, just to unwind and get my thoughts together." Johnny announced to his friends. It was his way of settling his anxiety and hopefully, once and for all, putting this whole emotional affair to rest. He was determine to sit in the same room as this man and show him that he had no hold over him; that Bobby Cipps meant absolutely nothing to him.

Bobby Cipps sat with his lawyer and went through what was needed for the upcoming hearing. He was confident that he would retain his job by showing he was addressing his problem with therapy. His body was tingling in anticipation of seeing Johnny in person; he had been disappointed when he realised his object of desire wasn't at the police hearing. He thought that his fellow firemen would be scoffing at Johnny for bringing the accusations against a brother fireman.

As Johnny sat on the cliff top soaking in Mother Nature's healing powers, Bobby Cipps closed his eyes and visualised the beautiful, perfect naked body of Johnny Gage. As peace and tranquillity ran through Johnny's body, euphoria and ecstasy ran through Bobby's body.

Johnny made peace with himself and the events that had happened to him over the last month. He no longer felt shame and guilt. His friends had shown him support and companionship; that they truly did trust him as a friend and fellow fireman.

Bobby was expecting to see a guilt ridden man who only had the support of his shiftmates at the hearing. He believed that the Fire Department would only give him a slap on the hand and maybe suspend him without pay for a month. He thought about how the department would be angry with Johnny for making the department look bad. He could then console the young man and apologise and ask to be friends and start over. Yes in his mind he could continue his obsession with this exquisite creature but would have to be careful, because he could no longer just look; he needed to finish what he had started to satisfy his thirst for Johnny Gage.


	9. Chapter 9

Roy and Cap knocked on Johnny's door. They were a little nervous for their friend. It was unnecessary as a smiling Johnny Gage answered the door. They noted the relaxed appearance as Johnny offered them coffee.

"That couple of days in the mountains seems to have done you the world of good" Cap said with approval.

"It did Cap...always does" he smiled.

"Shall we go?" asked Roy waving his arm to the door.

Johnny picked up his coat and all three men walked to Cap's car. Roy placed his hand on Johnny's shoulder and was pleased to not feel him duck away from the touch.

"Ready for this Junior?" he asked.

"More than ready. Once this is over I can get on with my life and start back at work" Johnny said with eagerness.

Cap parked around the back and they entered the building from the back. Johnny was a little surprised but thought it was because the hearing was being done secretly; behind closed doors so to speak. However it was for other reasons; reasons that Bobby Cipps was about to find out.

Bobby Cipps arrived with a spring in his step. Seeing John Gage in the flesh was sending his cravings into overdrive. As he approached the Fire Department's Headquarters building he could see a large group of firemen lining up at the front door.

Bobby Cipps's thoughts of the Fire Department and fellow firemen scoffing at Johnny Gage's accusations soon faded away. As he approached, the gathered firemen turned and glared at him. Some spat on the ground as he walked by; his thoughts of returning to work as if nothing had happened disappeared. His own shift was standing at the doorway, as his fellow lineman poured dirt on the ground in front of him he said "That's what we think of you. Don't even think of coming back to 127".

Bobby Cipps walked into the foyer and received more glares from the various chiefs and off duty captains. He met his lawyer further down the hall who was frowning.

"This isn't going to be easy Mr Cipps. Seems this Mr Gage has a lot of support" he professed.

Bobby ignored his lawyer's comment and continued to walk towards the hearing room; the only thing on his mind was John Gage. His anticipation to seeing him in person was clouding his judgement. Captain Badger was standing near the door and put up his hand gesturing for Bobby to stop.

"You are to wait out there until Johnny is seated and comfortable" he demanded.

Bobby's lawyer protested at their treatment but it fell on deaf ears. "I'm still your Captain, so I am ordering you to move and wait out there" he ordered.

Bobby and his lawyer moved back out of the way. Captain Badger gave the signal to Chief Houts who in turn waved at Cap to lead Johnny in. Johnny made his way into the room and sat down. Roy poured Johnny some water and asked him if he needed anything. Johnny shook his head and took a deep breath. He was ready he thought and sat up straight in his chair. The courage he was showing made Roy smile and beam with pride for his partner.

Bobby Cipps and his lawyer were the last to enter the room. Bobby immediately scanned the room for Johnny and was surprised to see the confident, smiling man sitting chatting to his partner.

Johnny didn't so much as give Bobby a second thought; he just continued to talk to Roy as the man entered the room. Johnny was glad to not feel the urge to rush to the bathroom.

Johnny felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Dr Early sitting behind him. "How do you feel Johnny" he asked?

"I feel good Doc" said Johnny giving the Doc a knowing smiling. He knew what he was really asking and it felt good to know the answer was 'Yes I can sit in the same room with Bobby Cipps and no longer feel the urge to wash my hands'.

The hearing was very straight forward; statements were read out of those not attending the hearing; statements were given by those attending; character references were read for Bobby's defence and then it came down to Johnny's testimony.

Johnny kept his testimony professional and stuck to facts. He explained that after having caught Bobby Cipps watching him on several occasions that he felt uncomfortable, but didn't elaborate. He mentioned finding his belt loose and told the committee what items of clothing he had put on after his shower. He kept calm and spoke with proficiency.

Bobby Cipps lawyer was not counting on Johnny being so thorough and professional with his testimony. There was no emotional behaviour to pounce on and turn against him. He made the mistake of all mistakes in his profession and changed his tact without preparation.

He told the committee that Mr Cipps was addressing some problems he was having by seeing a therapist and would continue to see that therapist and no longer had any desires towards John Gage. In making that statement he had told the committee that Bobby Cipps was guilty of all accusations.

Listening to his lawyer Bobby Cipps knew it was all over for him. The firemen outside had also confirmed that; he knew no one would work with him. All he had left was his craving for John Gage. He would have to find a way to quench his thirst outside the Fire Department. The more Johnny ignored him the more his obsession grew. No longer caring what the committee thought he stared at Johnny from across the room. His eyes swept over Johnny's body.

Johnny smiled and took a deep breath. He knew Bobby Cipps's career in the Fire Department was over. He could go back to work and no longer be concerned about running into him during a fire. He was totally unaware of Bobby's scrutiny of his self.

Roy stared at Cipps and saw how his eyes swept over Johnny. He also saw Cipps lick his lips with desire. Roy knew that he and his friends would have to convince this man to stay away from Johnny.

Johnny looked at Roy and noticed he was concentrating on something and turned to look at what Roy was looking at. His eyes met Bobby's, at first he felt a little afraid of the intensity in those eyes but a look of disgust came over him. He saw only the ugliness in this man and that reflected on his face.

Bobby looked away and didn't like the way Johnny had looked at him. He was losing his hold on Johnny and knew he would have to satisfy his desires soon, very soon.

When the hearing finished, Johnny was ushered out with Cap, Roy and Dr Early. They led him out the front to be confronted with station51, station127, station 8 and station10s' crews. A loud cheer went up for Johnny.

Roy felt Johnny tremble a little and put his hand on his shoulder to steady him. Johnny was overwhelmed with the support, but soon found his smile which led to more cheers. He drew strength from his friends and realised he should never have felt alone during the ordeal.

Bobby Cipps heard the cheering but ignored it along with his lawyer. He stormed out the back way and raced round the side of the building. He watched Johnny emerge from the sea of firemen and oozed with jealousy when fellow firemen shook his hand and slapped him on the back.

He discretely walked to his car and climbed in. A plan was already being formed. He realised he could not live his life without this beautiful man. His obsession with John Gage had a strangle hold on him and it had left him with only one option.


	10. Chapter 10

Johnny and the rest of his shift friends went back to Roys for an impromptu barbeque. Everyone's spirits were on a high knowing Johnny was taken seriously and that the matter had been dealt with properly.

"The departments changing, for the better." announced Cap.

"It still has a long way to go." countered Mike.

"Yeah I heard Tim got transferred to 18s of all stations." stated Johnny with disbelief.

"Seems he knew Cipps was bugging you but didn't report him to Badger and..." Chet wasn't sure how to say the next part without embarrassing Johnny. Roy gave him a slight shake of the head. Johnny noticed the exchange and pulled his lips together and frowned.

"What aren't you telling me...look I can handle it...tell me...come on guys I'm gonna find out sooner or later." implored Johnny.

Chet went on, "It seems Tim and Cipps were a couple at one time and Tim knew that Cipps was a bit obsessive." Chet shrugged as he confessed up the information.

Johnny looked at his hands and processed the information. Everyone waited, giving Johnny time to come to terms with the implications. Johnny hadn't really thought about the sexual preferences of Bobby before now. He thought about his working environment and how homosexuals were frowned at, but he had never really cared what other firemen preferred. This went beyond being gay, Bobby was sick. He had forced himself on another person; those were Dr Raymond's words and he agreed with them.

Johnny looked up and saw the concerned looks of his friends. "It's ok guys...I feel sorry for Tim...it wasn't his fault...Bobby is a sick man. He needs help." He said sadly.

Roy couldn't believe how forgiving his partner was and he realised he needed to change his own attitude towards Bobby. Here, was his brave partner willing to see that Bobby Cipps was simply unable to help himself and needed professional help, whereas all he wanted to do was beat the living daylights out of this man. He felt humbled and realised how incredibly lucky he was to call Johnny his friend.

Cap, Chet and Mike were thinking pretty much the same thing. "I guess everyone needs to change, not just the brass." stated Mike.

Everyone nodded in unison. They asked Johnny about his previous stations that he had worked at and pranks that were played on him as a boot. Everyone imparted with what pranks had been played on them during their probation. Caps was the best; he found his boots tied to the top of the flag pole after he fought his first fire, and when he turned around the whole crew were standing behind him saluting him. He said he really felt he was part of the crew after that.

The friends broke up the gathering and headed off to home. Chet drove Johnny home. They didn't see the car that was parked down Roy's street sitting, waiting and then following them to Johnny's apartment. They didn't see the malevolent eyes that were seeking glimpses of their obsession. Chet waited and watched Johnny walk up the stairs to his apartment and drove out once he was satisfied that his young friend was safely inside his apartment.

Cipps obsessed over urges to have John Gage in front of him naked and submissive. His hands shook as he held the steering wheel of his car and searched the apartment block for traces of his obsession. 'Tomorrow you are mine.' He chanted as he slowly drove away.

The next day Johnny received word that he was cleared to start next shift. He drove to Rampart hospital and found Dr Early in his office catching up on paper work.

"Hello Johnny, take a seat." he gestured towards a couch in his office. Dr Early sat next to the paramedic. "Now to what do I owe this pleasure?"

Johnny smiled, "I just wanted to thank you Doc for everything. Without your help, and understanding, I probably would have lost my career and life as I know it. Thanks." He held out his hand and shook Dr Early's hand.

"I hear you start back tomorrow" Dr Early said smiling. Johnny nodded. "Well, all I can say is take it slowly and remember what Andy taught you and you'll be fine. I was very proud of the way you handled yourself yesterday and you should be proud of yourself too."

"I am Doc; I feel like someone has reached into my stomach and untied a huge knot that had been sitting there for a long time. Kind of like being set free." Johnny said with self-confidence.

"That's good Johnny." Dr Early looked down at his fingers. "You know one of the most satisfying things as a doctor is to see a patient return to their life healthy and happy. It's even more satisfying when it's a friend." They both stood and shook hands again.

"I'll see you next shift Doc." Johnny said as he made his way to the door.

"No doubt you will." replied Dr Early chuckling.

They both exited the office to a scene that will haunt both Dr Early and Johnny for the rest of their lives.

Tim watched Johnny enter Dr Early's office. He had wanted to see Johnny and apologise, however he wondered if he would accept it. Movement near the wall opposite the office caught Tim's eye. Bobby was leaning against the wall watching the office door. Tim squeezed his eyes shut; Bobby was still obsessed with station 51s paramedic. He needed to convince him that it was wrong and that he needed to move on with his life. This obsession was becoming dangerous for both Bobby and Johnny Gage.

Tim slowly approached Bobby to try to reason with him; to tell him that he had to move on and forget about John Gage. Bobby slowly turned his head and watched Tim approach.

"Bobby you've got to stop and you have to leave. The hospital won't tolerate you being here and bothering Johnny." Tim pleaded with the stoic man. He stood and waited for Bobby to give some sort of indication that he had heard his plea.

Bobby slowly and deliberately straightened up. With lightening reflexes, he grabbed Tim taking him by complete surprise. Bobby snaked his arm around Tim's neck and pointed a knife at his jugular.

"Now we're just going to relax and wait for Johnny to come out, and he's going to come with me." Bobby whispered in Tim's ear. The iciness in his voice made Tim shiver with fear.

Everyone within sight of the unfolding scene was frozen, not daring to move in case the knife moved. No one thought to call security.

Johnny and Dr Early gasped at the sight of Tim being held with a knife pointing to his neck. He struggled when the door opened and Bobby pierced the skin of Tim's neck. A trickle of blood ran down his neck staining his collar.

"Bobby, don't do this." pleaded Johnny. His eyes locked with Tim's. Fear radiated from them. Johnny tried to reflect friendship and strength to Tim.

"If you come with me I'll let him go." responded Bobby to Johnny's pleading.

"Bobby, that's not going to happen, you need help. Please let Tim go and we can get you some help. Come on let him go." Johnny begged.

Bobby looked at Johnny with knowing eyes. "All I've ever wanted is someone like you. You're perfect, you know…. I've never wanted someone so badly as I want you...but I realise now I'll never have you," and with swift action, he sliced the knife across Tim's neck. He dropped the stricken paramedic and ran to the stairs.

Both the paramedic and the doctor ran to Tim. Johnny immediately applied pressure to Tim's jugular while Dr Early hit the security alarm and yelled out orders. A nurse appeared with a tray and Dr Early immediately started clamping Tim's throat. The injured paramedic was lifted onto a gurney and rushed up to surgery.

Johnny watched them disappear and looked down at his hands and the floor. They were covered in blood; Tim's blood. Dixie came running round the corner along with another paramedic, Tim's partner. Her eye's went wide with shock.

Dixie took one look at Johnny and grabbed his arm and led him into a treatment room. She started cleaning his hands and checked for any cuts.

"This is Tim's blood Dix..." Johnny looked at her through distraught eyes. "He cut his throat without even thinking about it...just cut his throat." Dixie could see Johnny was going into shock as his body started to shake.

"Whose throat?...not Tim's!" Cried the paramedic.

Johnny nodded. His eye's reflected the tragedy of the situation.

"Oh God!" the paramedic rushed from the room.

Dixie placed a blanket around Johnny's shoulders and led him to the doctor's lounge. She poured him a cup of coffee. The warmth from the coffee thawed his frozen feelings. "It happened so fast Dix…..One minute I was pleading with Bobby to let Tim go….and the next he just…..Oh God." Dix rubbed his shoulders, trying to console the distraught man.

"You can't blame yourself Johnny. No one knew he was capable of such malice." Dix continued to rub Johnny's shoulders. He nodded. Dix was right. He sighed and shook his head.

"He needs help…..maybe he'll get it now….but at what price Dix?" Johnny looked sadly at the nurse. He smiled slightly, "Thanks." She smiled back, knowingly.

Dr Raymond burst through the door.

"Johnny you need to come with me. Bobby Cipps is up on the roof threatening to jump. We need to talk him down. If you stand with me….maybe….just maybe….he'll listen."

"Ok. If you think me being there will help." Johnny stood, he was steadier on his feet and felt better after the coffee. "Thanks Dix" he smiled at his friend.

"Be careful Johnny. You owe this man nothing." she declared.

"I know Dix but as you just pointed out, he needs help." Johnny told her sadly.

Johnny and Dr Raymond walked briskly to the elevator. "Johnny just follow my lead. I need to calm him and talk him down."

"I know Doc...I'm a paramedic remember." Johnny smiled, but then became serious as the doors opened. Dr Raymond thought about how far this man had come over the past month. He respected and admired Johnny's inner strength. They stepped out onto the roof; security was standing in an arc watching Bobby closely. Both men approached the agitated man cautiously.

"Bobby, Johnny's here and he wants to help you." Dr Raymond informed the agitated man.

Bobby turned his head, his eyes were dead. "Johnny, I'm doing this for you Johnny."

"Bobby DON'T!" Everyone stood frozen, as the shock engulfed them.

Johnny didn't hear Dr Raymond speak to him as he led him down stairs to a treatment room in ER. He was unaware of the light sedative given to him by Dr Raymond. While he slept Roy was called. He burst through the ER doors and was lead to the treatment room that his young paramedic partner inhabited. Roy took a seat next to his sleeping partner while Dr Raymond explained what had happened.

Johnny could hear the murmur of voices and slowly opened his eyes. His head felt like it had been stuffed with cotton wool. He tried to blink away the fuzziness.

Dr Early came rushing through the door in his scrubs. "I just heard, is Johnny alright?"

Johnny blinked a few times and looked up at concerned faces. "Hey Junior." said Roy smiling. "Had a tough afternoon, hey?" Johnny slowly rose, using his elbows as leverage. Roy hit the control button and raised the head of the bed.

"Yeah. How's Tim?" he asked Dr Early as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"He's going to make it but we weren't able to save his voice box." Dr Early said sorrowfully.

"Johnny I think if you want we should probably meet for a session in a couple of days." Dr Raymond patted the young man's shoulder.

"Sure Doc, I'm working tomorrow so day after tomorrow?" Johnny asked not smiling but not so stunned as he was up on the roof.

"Take things slowly tomorrow Johnny. Don't push yourself." Advised Dr Raymond. He turned to Roy, "You'll need to drive him home, he shouldn't be driving so soon after a sedative."

"Ok." Roy nodded to the Doc and then turned to Johnny. "I'll get Chet and Marco to pick up your car and drop it at your apartment." Dr Raymond waved goodbye and left the treatment room.

Johnny slowly rose; he felt a bit unsteady and tried to stretch the fuzziness from his body. Even after the drugged nap, he felt incredibly tired.

"I am sorry about Tim Doc." Johnny said shaking his head; a young man's career had been sliced away by a sick obsessed man.

Johnny returned to work and got back into the swing of things without too much trouble. His session with Dr Raymond went well and Johnny dealt with the guilt he was feeling and accepted that there wasn't anything he could have done to change what had happened to both Tim and Bobby.

It was a month later that Johnny received a call from Dr Early. "Johnny I'm at the clinic and I was wondering if you were still serious about helping out?" asked Dr Early.

"You bet Doc." He said enthusiastically.

"I have someone who would like to meet you and just talk."

"I'm on my way Doc. Is it alright if Roy comes with me, my cars out of service and Roy's my chauffer? "Roy hit him in the arm.

"That's fine Johnny we could use some extra hands down here." Dr Early chuckled.

"See you soon Doc." Johnny turned to Roy and said, "They could use your help too partner." Roy just shook his head at his partner and pushed him towards the door.

Johnny sat and talked and listened to the young girl who was being abused in her workplace by a manager. He reassured her that she needed to come forward and maybe tell another female, who was respected by the managers, about her problem. She just needed someone to listen and understand what she was going through. He comforted her and told her to trust her friends for help.

Roy watched his partner with pride. Dr Early came up and stood beside Roy. "You know I feel blessed to be able to call Johnny my friend. He's one of the bravest men I've ever known."

"Yeah he is that Doc and the most forgiving." Roy smiled remembering the lesson Johnny had taught him.


End file.
